Do you want to know the most important tool you need have in your self-development toolbox in order to reach all of your goals? I'll tell you, but only if you truly, honestly, want to know...

Honesty

There, the cat's out of the bag. No putting it back in. Now you know. You can't ever say you didn't get the news.

Any change you want to make, any goal you set out to achieve, begins on a foundation of honesty. You must tell yourself the truth about where you are, where you want to be, and what you are going to do to get there. You must be totally, unequivocally, 100% no-bull honest. Anything less and you're setting yourself up for difficult times and ultimate failure.

I've worked with many, many people who beat themselves up for failing to meet the goals they've set only to discover -- after getting them to be brutally honest -- that they didn't really want those goals after all. And time and again I hear people make commitments to themselves or their friends and families that, upon investigation, they either can't keep or don't truly intend to pursue.

Whether "big" or "small", intentional or accidental, this dishonesty hurts us. We may not be aware of it on a conscious level, but our mind and our hearts know, and remember. And the more we do it, the more we try to fool ourselves, the more our lives spin out of control and out of alignment with who we truly are.

So take some time to think about everything that you're doing -- all of the goals you're pursuing. Ask yourself the tough questions: Is this what I really want? Is this what I really need to be doing right now? Is this who I want to be? Am I getting what I need from my family, friends, support group?

Answer these questions honestly and be true to yourself.

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Jim M. Allen, The Big Idea Coach, is a professional life, business & guerrilla marketing coach and the editor of MyNewAttitude.com. For more great ideas, read his Big Idea blog or subscribe to his free bi-weekly ezine.