Whether it's Thanksgiving, Christmas or any other party day, it pays
to know how to be a good guest.
First things first. When you get an invitation, R.S.V.P. The host
or hostess needs to know how many to plan for.
Arrive 10-15 minutes after the invitation time (but no later). This
gives your host and/or hostess those last few minutes to prepare.
When you call to R.S.V.P., check and see if children are invited, if
they haven't been explicit. If they aren't, don't bring yours. Nor should you expect your host and hostess to solve the babysitter
dilemma for you.
Don't arrive empty-handed. A bottle of wine, a bouquet of flowers, a
packet of printed cocktail napkins, a little inspirational book ...
Offer to help in the kitchen, offer to help with the dishes. You may
be told "no," but at least you asked.
Participate! It's up to you to make it a party. Being a guest is not
a passive thing. A good party or get-together relies on everyone
being present and making it good. Talk to someone who's alone, mix
and mingle, make good conversation, make it a point to talk with
everyone there at some point, do your part.
Don't overstay your welcome, no matter how much you're enjoying
yourself. Why? You had a nap, got your nails done, watched the
football game. They've been cooking and cleaning for days. Use your
intuition. You may've been told 2-5, or just "come around 8", but
your host and/or hostess will give off nonverbal signals when it's
time for you to go home.
Pitch in in an unobtrusive way. Take some coats to the coatroom,
empty some ash trays, clear off the coffee table of used dishes,
whisk your hosts' kid off to the bathroom, pass around a plate of hot
hors d'oeuvres. Just every now and then look around to see what you
might do.
Say good-bye. Even if it's a large gathering, seek out the host
and/or hostess and tell them good bye, and thank them!
And lastly, send a written thank-you note afterwards. It's just a
nice thing to do. Don't forget to do this for family, they might be
the most important of all. Think how much your mom would appreciate
if you wrote her a note after the get-together!
__________
Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc.
Coaching, Internet courses, ebooks and teleclasses for your
personal and professional development, centered around
emotional intelligence. Email Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for more
information or FREE ezine. Put "ezine" for subject line.
©2005 Susan Dunn ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
